dearest friend...

i am hoping you find your way onto this site again. it has been a long time since i last wrote anything here. today was a very odd day. we have had more than our share of frustrations. but i know that it all stems from being so far apart.

still.....
i do not know what to do.
i do not know how to make things right.

i am not sleeping with anyone. and there is no indication that it will happen. i wish you could believe that. i believe you when you tell me you are not sleeping with her. why can't you trust me?

as to the $1.99 african violets -- i was not putting the flowers down. yes, they are lovely. and i was not defending him. i just got irritated by the way you said it... putting them down compared to your $100-plus bouquets. it's not the amount spent on the flowers that matters - it is the love that they are given with, that matters.

do you even know what my favorite flower is? i bet you don't.

i love all of the flowers that you gave me - every time. yes, i did feel special and loved and spoiled.... but i would have loved you just the same if you had pulled up some sunflower growing on the side of the road and handed it to me with a kiss......

i am such a hopeless romantic.

and i love you still. so much that it hurts.

i miss you. why do you have to live so far away?

always,
m.c.